So I was having coffee (read hot chocolate) with this guy I know here.. and turns out I had a lot of talking inside me bursting to come out! We started talking about Musharraf's resignation, the fact that my friend (the guy I was speaking to) had just gotten married and was returning from his honey moon and somehow ended up talking about how unnatural urban living is, and religion and life, and philosophy for the next two hours!
I am not feeling particularly articulate or verbose after the long spiels I went on last night, but these were the main topics:
- feeling disconnected and away from nature. Sub topics: processed food, natural unprocessed food more expensive than processed food which technically was more expensive to prepare being totally f-ed up and unintuitive,
- Capitalism, urban neurosis, consumerism, individuality, taking away from the idea of community. Making it virtually impossible to have a community for people who aren't economically and financially blessed/privileged. You have to be extra rich and work ultra hard to have what you would think should be a "normal life"
- Religion as political and as a revelation from god is bullshit. As a guide to a way of life, as a source of ritual and community, as a means to express your spirituality - makes more sense.
- Catholic punishment guilt vs ridiculously opulent churches dichotomy is kind of abusive.
Yes yes we have heard all of this a million times, and for some reason, the ideas are completely prevalent, everyone knows it, but the only people trying to escape the neurosis of modern urban living are hairy hippies who don't shower and who talk in a california drawl even when they are from the east coast. What gives? Being part of a community and eating real food shouldn't be an "alternative lifestyle"! It shouldn't be "leftist liberal socialist crap", it shouldn't be "oh those crazy pot smoking kids". How the hell did this happen? Alternatively it also shouldn't be rich pseudo-intellectual, liberal, leftist crap! I mean this is sensual, real, tangible stuff we are talking about. How did the intellectual leftists or the spaced out hippies become associated with it?? You are supposed to be in touch with your emotions and your body to want these things, not be lost in your brain dammit.
And it really shouldn't be inconvenient and you shouldn't have to go out of your way grmph.
Which brings me to other thoughts I have been having for about a month or so which somehow feel connected.
So emotional "boundaries" are an important issue in relationships, which I may not have been the best at paying attention to in the past, though I think I have gotten better (to the extent of having ridiculously strict boundaries). So my sister mentioned it to me the other day - and I figured I would pay respects to my gods and so I Googled "emotional boundaries" and apparently, people who have trouble with boundaries are people who have a not so completely developed "Ego". It's really bizarre and sad that the word ego has the connotations and meanings it does associated with it (egotistical, arrogant etc), while its meaning in Freudian psychology is completely different. SO I figured the next thing was to pray to my other gods to see what the definition for Ego really was within psychology, and Wikipedia dutifully answered:
Anyway, I think it's worth checking in and analysing how well developed your Ego really is, because having a good rapport between your Super Ego and Id is generally pretty useful. That's all I am saying.
SO the last thing I wanted to say is.. that I have housewife fantasies sometimes. And it bothers me that I can be so lame as to have house wife fantasies... But I broke it down into its sub-parts:
1) house wives get to see sunlight during the day time hours since there is no 9 to 5
2) in my head, being a house wife entails living in pakistan where so far the more natural food IS cheaper, the weather is warmer, mangos and guavas are good quality and easily available, and there is a beach nearby.
3) i dont need to work :P or stress about money, cuz someone else takes care of the finances.
Yeah so... what's wrong with that?